Alhambra Juvie High

ASTRID TOVAR
Staff Writer

Let’s turn our schools into prisons! According to a recent study, California spends up to five times more on prisons than on public schools. And not just in California, but all around the United States, prisons receive more state funding than our schools. Honestly, I think schools deserve just a little bit more. And if we’re not going to get the attention we deserve, we can just turn our school into a prison—with the same academic goals, of course.
Now before you think I want our kids behind bars, hear me out. If our school were a prison, we’d get three square meals a day, all of them made to fuel a grown man. Drinking water would be available to anyone who needs it. Every student would be provided with a room and bedding, and, hey, we’re stuck sitting in a classroom for seven hours normally, so why not? We could get a bathroom in our room. A nice, clean, working toilet, all to ourselves! No more waiting in line, or having to look at a mess you really don’t want to. We will even get a roll or two of toilet paper.
Students would be let out for exercise for at least 60 minutes daily (I’m not too sure all those stairs do us any good). Our security would be considerably beefed up too. As for contact with the outside world, that might stay the same. We’ll get the occasional call from home, whenever they decide to allow us to use our phones, but if not, we’ll be in the general area.
Whatever else comes with the package is sure to please everyone; I see no loss there. Now there’s no way the government can ignore us now—we’ll be almost as important as the prisons! And here we thought that would never happen.